Violence, Violence and then some...

Why are we Indian's bombing each other up? When is all of this going to stop? When are we even going to think logically about whom we are harming and how it affects our economy?

Sitting comfortably in Canada enjoying the riches a First World Country has to offer, I am plagued with the impending decision – should I return to the motherland or not? The only reason why I am thinking of something I swore I’d never do is because –

a.) Every educated person in India is fleeing the country and

b.) Is it safe for us minorities anymore?

Definition of the term ‘Brain Drain’ by Wikipedia.

“Brain drain or human capital flight is a large emigration of individuals with technical skills or knowledge, normally due to conflict, lack of opportunity, political instability, or health risks.”

I am proud of being Indian.

But...

I do have reservations about people from one faith killing people of any community or hurting anyone’s religious place of worship, or raping and molesting women who are trying to help marginalized or people on the border-line to get out of their poverty filled lifestyle and rise against all odds.

Proponents of the Brain Drain theory have it right, but it also all comes down to who we are as individuals. As mammals with a mind to think, understand and rationalyse information fed to us - we somehow do a very poor job of using our mind. We let out actions take control and deal with the consequences later.

No point in wishful thinking - of asking some volatile elements in our country to stop this spread of hatred and animosity amongst our own brethren and try to forge a relationship of peace and goodwill. By asking that would mean trying to tap onto their good side. Unfortunately their skins are as tough as the skin on the back of a camel... Id be deluding myself.

Seems like such a shame, such a young independent nation ruinedby the likes of such men. Like President-Elect Barack Obama states... - NOW IS THE TIME FOR CHANGE! COME ON INDIA!

Shine again.

Can't lose what you never had

~ At night I pray, that soon your face will fade away

~ Sorry seems to be the hardest word
~ You cut me open and I keep bleeding, keep keep bleeding love

~ Once again I'm thinking about, taking the easy way out

~ And there's hope that keeps me going on

~ These streets remind me of quick sand, when your on it, you keep going down

~ Silence like a cancer grows

~ Give us faith so we'll be safe

~ This love is unbreakable, it's unmistakable, and each time I look in your eyes, I know why

~ In the arms of the angel, may you find some comfort here

~ As the stars sparkle down like a diamond ring, I'll treasure this moment, till we meet again

~ A simple line can make you laugh or cry

~ Fear is the enemy

~ But my dreams they aren’t as empty, as my conscience seems to be

~ Life is ours, we live it our way

~ But I just bit on my lip and my face began to frown

~ I let you in and you let me down

~ I can't deny what I believe, I can't be what I'm not

~ Alone, I can hear, hear our song, playing for me again

~ And I miss you, like the deserts miss the rain

~ You have everything and you're still lonely

~ Let the rain come down and wash away my tears, let it feed my soul and drown my fears

~ Word's can't bring me down

~ But it's time to face the truth, I will never be with you

~ Like you're oldest friend, just trust the voice within

~ Can't remember when, I last saw you laughing

~ A whole life so lonely, and then you come and ease the pain

~ I've loved you forever, in lifetimes before

~ I'll build your dreams with these two hands

~ Take the very breath you gave me, take the heart from my chest

~ And this choice I made keeps playing in my head

~ Running low on faith and gasoline

~ Since you've been gone my world's been dark and gray

~ If only I had said what I still hide

~ Do you think how it would have been sometimes

~ Flashback, warm nights, almost left behind, suitcases of memories, time after

~ Since you been gone I can do whatever I want

~ Because of you, I never stray too far from the sidewalk

~ She's the sweetest drug

~ It's like I'm taking five steps forward, and ten steps back

~ In the end it doesn't even matter

~ Sand in my shoes

~ There will be no white flag above my door

~ It reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad

~ I don't know that's just the way I am

~ Everytime you go away, you take a piece of me with you

~ Everybody wants to rule the world

~ No matter what the end is, my life began with you

~ How you turn to me and smile, you take my breath away

~ I wanna be with you everywhere

~ Something in your voice makes me wanna lose myself in your arms

~ Now most days I felt like a child whose afraid of ghosts in the night

~ The road to heaven is paved with good intentions

~ They ain't never gonna catch me riding dirty

~ Maybe I'm just a bad girl

~ Step by step, heart to heart, left right left, we all fall down, like toy soldiers

Taking a bow

Just sick of love songs, sick of tears, sick of wishing you were here...

Career or love?

What a lousy choice and that too one every person has to consider... give up on the love of a lifetime or give up on the career that you've been planning forever.
I do not understand why there cannot be a balance. My whole belief is if the top guy has given me 24 hours in a day and if I cannot give even five minutes to the person whom I am crazy about just to send an email or sms or call and say I love him/her then what is the point of being in a relationship in the first place? Am I just a dress up doll? For show when people come over or some porcelain Chinese plate, to be used only during fine dining?

I understand. I understand that you have priorities. I understand that the world isn’t ready for you and me – for us. I understand there are things you want to fulfill and accomplish. But I guess I need to be blessed with more understanding and more patience. It’s not like I am running out of it, it’s just that I don’t want to feel left out of your life.

Career first – and I agree. But then what? Do I just stay hidden in the shadows? Do I let failed relationships dictate out future? Is this a test or is this for real? What if while I take a backseat someone steals you away from me? Heck you think someone’s gonna steal me away so why not vice versa?

Low profile. Space. Silence. Unanswered questions. Loneliness. Hurt mixed with misery. Love. Lust. Power. Ego.

… and there’s hope that keeps me going on…

A NEW START

Everything about me has changed... From my bob cut hair-do to my small yet prominent paunch, from a happy-go-lucky-carefree girl to an often silent and lost woman now.

I'm an adult - and not so thrilled about it.

Remember when you were 5 years old and you just couldnt wait to grow up. You just waited for a chance for someone to ask you how old you were and you would stand erect with your head high and say "I am almost 5 and a half going to be 6 years old!" I remember saying stuff like that. I also remember starting college and everybody who is anybody would be doing the coolest ‘in thing’ at that age - hang out at clubs. Everyone wanted to enter the place but you had to look 18. At 5 feet nothing, with pimples and no boobs you're definitely not 18!

Yet here I am at 23 panicking at the thought of even hitting 25 - lets not talk about my allergic reactions bordering on occasional rash breakouts at the thought of reaching 30...*arrgh* And then you have the usual "Reena just got engaged" and "Have you heard the good news - Mary had a baby boy" - well Mary could give birth to a little lamb and I would still run as fast as my 23-year-old legs could to get away from that conversation.

This is my life. This is what I want to talk about. Random things which may sometimes border on gibberish, fairies, princes and princesses, books i love and music I abhor, loves that I have lost and new ones I someday hope to find.

May you find some comfort here…

~ArrivedercI~